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“Ah,” the child thinks, “My work here is done.” Or is it? He wants to make sure that the viewer also understands that “Healthy relationships help us grow to be happy, healthy, strong, kind, and productive.” A win for the child, a win for the community. Then the child, in closing, goes on to express appreciation to the viewer for “… listening and understanding,” which, not so coincidently, happen to be two of the most important keys to relationship health.Neuroscience and research findings such as those provided by The Center on the Developing Child - Harvard, the Harvard Study on Adult Development, the Adverse Childhood Experiences Study out of Kaiser Permanente and the CDC, and hundreds of others redundantly demonstrate that providing children with healthy, caring, supportive, violence-and-abuse-free relationships at home, school, and in between dramatically raises the odds of their experiencing emotional, behavioral, cognitive, social, and physical health throughout their childhood and adulthood. Resilient children are more capable of surviving the inevitable knock downs and losses of life, getting back up, recovering, and going on to lead full, constructive and meaningful lives.

Do you want to prevent violence? Surrounding children with healthy relationships, reducing poverty, providing early identification and effective intervention for victim/survivors of abuse, neglect, mental illness, and serious trauma, together with keeping guns out of the hands of those whose behavior signals serious instability or threat, will take care of the bulk of it.“But wait!” some of you say. “You raise kids to be too nice, caring, and empathetic and you’re going to be raising a bunch of naïve and vulnerable individuals just waiting to be taken advantage of and victimized by those who think empathy is to be used solely for the purpose of manipulation, exploitation and domination.” Hmm, a valid concern, unless we also understand that treating people with respect, understanding, and empathy is, in fact, totally compatible with also possessing a healthy degree of vigilance, learning the warning signs of predators, abusers, and con people, setting and enforcing healthy boundaries, being appropriately assertive, refusing to tolerate abusive behavior, defending oneself and others when necessary, and pursuing healthy self- interest without exploiting others. We have to model and teach the whole package.

And, do you think that some of our political leaders might benefit by taking to heart the PSA’s message? Because if they did, that benefit just might trickle down to more of us in the form of healthier role modeling, community, and governmental functioning.To watch this PSA (available in English, Spanish, and Vietnamese languages) and, like the child says, “…for more information on Healthy Relationships…” please visit our website at www.healthyrelationshipsscc.com/ and click on the Healthy Relationships banner. And please consider passing this PSA and message on. It’s good to remember the fundamentals.